<!-- Begin
var h = 32
var q = new Array(h+1)
q[0]="Wear short sleeves!  Support your right to bare arms!"
q[1]="Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like clearing the drive before it has stopped snowing. "
q[2]="All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand."
q[3]="A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer."
q[4]="Beat the 5 o'clock rush, leave work at noon!"
q[5]="What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef."
q[6]="Why aren't there ever any GUILTY bystanders?"
q[7]="It's amazing what you can do when your wife puts your mind to it."
q[8]="It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it."
q[9]="Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting any."
q[10]="Anything not nailed down is mine. (Anything I can pry loose is not nailed down)"
q[11]="Help Wanted: Telepath. You know where to apply."
q[12]="Frisbeetarianism:  The belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck."
q[13]="A flying saucer results when a nudist spills his coffee."
q[14]="Sooner or later, doesn't EVERYONE stop smoking?"
q[15]="Never wrestle with a pig: You both get all dirty, and the pig likes it."
q[16]="Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level then beat you with experience."
q[17]="Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines."
q[18]="Mixed emotions:  Watching the school burn down when your new catcher's mitt is in your desk."
q[19]="Smith & Wesson:  The original point and click interface."
q[20]="If the enemy is in range, so are you."
q[21]="The easy way is always mined."
q[22]="Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo."
q[23]="Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at."
q[24]="If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid."
q[25]="When in doubt empty the magazine."
q[26]="Never share a fox hole with anyone braver than you."
q[27]="Mines are equal opportunity weapons."
q[28]="Friendly fire - isn't."
q[29]="There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole."
q[30]="Tracers work both ways."
q[31]="You don't win a war by dying for your country.  You win a war by making the other son-of-a-bitch die for his.      - General Patton"
q[32]="If we weren't meant to eat animals, then why are they made of meat?"
q[33]="Five second fuses only last three seconds."
q[33]="Always remember your weapon was made by the lowest contract."
q[34]="Those who beat their swords into plowshares will plow for those who don't."
q[35]="Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do."
q[36]="Odd objects attract fire - never lurk behind one."
q[37]="A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it.  That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit. - In the August 1993 issue, page 9, of PS magazine, the Army's magazine of preventive maintenance."
q[38]="Here at Artillery Command we have at our disposal one hundred and fifty five millimetre howitzers, fuel air explosives and guided missiles in multiple launch systems. Some people say we think that we're God. We're not God.  We just borrowed his 'SMITE' button for our fire control system"


function r(){
var t = -1
while (t < 0 || t > h || isNaN(t)){
t = parseInt(Math.random()*(h+1))
}
return t
}
quo = r()
quox = q[quo]
document.write("<center><table border=0 bgcolor=#000000 cellpadding=2 cellpadding=0 width=120 height=100><tr><td><table border=0 bgcolor=#FFFFFF cellpadding=5 cellspacing=0 width=100% height=100%><tr><td><center><font face=\"Arial, Helvetica\" color=\"000000\" size=-1><b>" + quox + "</td></tr><tr><td><center><font size=-3 face=\"Arial, Helvetica\"><b><a href=\"http://www.bentcover.com/index.html\">www.bentcover.com</a><br></b></center></font></td></tr></table></td></tr></table></center>")
// End -->

